Adding Value…

In today’s freebie-hungry society, many people are always looking for a deal. Don’t get me wrong, I’m all about saving a buck whenever I can, but once in a while we need to take a moment to ask ourselves whether we are a giver or a taker on this earth.

I don’t want to be remembered as a taker. You know the type. The people who seem so nice and easy going but would knock you down and trample you underfoot to be the firs person in line if someone announced they were handing out $5 bills.

Being a taker is not an attractive quality. It’s a sign of an immature, selfish nature and people don’t really care to hang around that for very long. The ironic part of being a taker is that they inevitably end up last in life. The harder a person pushes to get what they want, the further away and more elusive it becomes.

Being a giver is not just part of our nature. It is something that must be actively developed. It’s a settling of our inner spirit and is really a part of self discipline. The best way to keep a conscious awareness of being a giver is to think of these two words “add value.” Everywhere we go, everyone we come into contact with, ask this question, “Did I just ADD value to that person or situation, or did I take it away.” This takes diligence and a focused effort, but the good news is that once this way of thinking is practiced for a few weeks, it will become a part of who we are.

The fun part about adding value to a person’s life is that if it’s a stranger, it will just be a blip….an isolated incident that has taken place in their life, but with some people it makes such a profound effect, that it is almost startling.

Once there was a man in front of me in the grocery line. Once the cashier gave him his total, he looked at his cash and change for a minute and then asked her to take a few items off the bill.

I already knew what was going on so I was rummaging for my own change at the same time. Before the cashier could take any of his groceries off I handed the guy about 75 cents….”here, here, it’s no big deal, just use this and don’t put anything back.” “No, I couldn’t, ” he responded. “No seriously, it’s a few cents…no big deal.” He took the change, thanked me about four times and told me that he’d pay me back if he ever saw me again. After he left the cashier told me that she knew him personally. “He’d give you the shirt off his back, a real genuine guy.” It made me feel happy inside that I could extend myself the tiniest bit and know that I added value. I don’t know if he ever thinks of the weird lady who insisted on giving him 75 cents, but I will remember him. And what if he does think of me from time to time. Isn’t it cool to know that a complete stranger remembers you as “the nice weird lady” instead of “that horrible person who cussed me out in the parking lot when my door hit her car.” I think so.

Adding value doesn’t give you a smug feeling like “oh look, I’m a do-gooder.” Instead it gives you a sense of belonging, like, “Hey, I’m part of the human race and it’s still okay to help someone out…big or small, it still adds positive energy to this earth and it still adds value.”

Once when I was on food stamps with three small children to care for, someone handed me an envelope and told me it wasn’t from them. They were just the messenger. It had several hundred dollars in it and was exactly what I needed at the time. I’m not one to advertise my needs, ever. So this was quite a shocker. But at that moment, in my heart of hearts I knew that this world really does turn on the basic principles of “you reap what you sow.” I’m not saying I deserved the money, but I sure did need it, and it came just at the right time. Things have a way of working themselves out that way when we are more concerned about the needs of others then we are the needs of ourselves.

Add value……everywhere. If you don’t have money or time, give a smile, or a “I’m glad I know you…I’m glad you’re in my life.” They need it, we need it, the world needs it.

Be slow to anger, slow to judge, and slow to lose your temper…The person in front of you may be driving like a snail and talking on their cell phone and you may be late for work…but you only have your side of the story. Worst case scenario, the person in front of you may be driving so slowly and on the other end of the line, someone may be telling them that their hospitalized parent is getting worse. Give everyone the benefit of the doubt, add value….and together we can make this world a better place.